Thursday, April 26, 2007

Meet the New Earth, Same As the Old Earth (only bigger)

So NASA quietly secured the future of humanity this week by discovering Earth 2.

Earth 2--that's my name for it, by the way, not NASA's (they call it something stupid like Gliese, which, to me, sounds like one of those ice-dancing moves)--is basically like Earth, but with a few important differences.

-It's bigger than Earth, by like...1.5 times.

-It's about 14 times closer to its sun than we are to ours.

-Its sun is significantly weaker than our's, meaning that it can be a ton closer to its sun without it being way hotter than Earth is.

-It's orbit around its sun lasts only 13 days. So now we can start doing the whole "dog-years" conversions to find our Earth 2 age. One Earth Year is equal to 28 Gliese years. So on Gliese, I'd be 868, which means I'm gaining on Methuselah.

So what I need to know is this: when do we start colonizing this bad boy? I mean...heck, if there's another Earth-like planet, with liquid water and breathable air...who the crap cares about Global Warming anymore?! Let's just trash this sucker and move on to the next locusts.

Plus, since this planet is 50% bigger....that means we don't have to worry about overpopulation yet. So we can keep reproducing like rabbits without the fear of diminishing resources.

Of course, with out current would take 20.5 light years to get there. But there's hope that new theories on hyperspace will speed up that trip.

Anyway, this is great news, folks. Now, if some alien race comes to destroy our planet, a la Titan A.E. or like the Vogons, we're good to go. We just need some bigger space ships so we can all get there together. Like the Titanic of spaceships. All aboard the Earth 2 Express!!!

Oh crap, I almost can watch nerdy people discussing and explaining Earth 2 in this YouTube video:

(also talked about on Spulch)

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